Tag: journal

tomorrow  – friday going to the beach.

It’s been a shit life. I won’t miss it. Can’t wait to die and be put out of my misery.

So glad my sister home from the hospital last night. So glad they didn’t find nothing serious. At my moms

That time I thought I was finally going to be happy. Lmao 😕😐

Holy motherfucking shit I hate everyone and everything. Every time I turn around there is a new problem or something

🅸 🅳🅾🅽’🆃 🅵🅴🅴🅻 🅶🅾🅾🅳

drinking coffee cause i’m out of hot chocolate lol. either way – i like it sweet 🙂 

my family hates me.

so we went to the beach saturday afternoon and stayed until sunday afternoon.  i love going to the beach in

i need to start updating this more. so much other bs has been going on in life lately making me

so i got on twitch for the first time in a week. just been depressed and all lately and not

I feel overwhelmed a lot and my memory is shit. 

our test came back negative. yay 🙂 other stuff is causing anxiety today though. i will probably need an anxiety

Broke my fucking glasses today. I swear it’s always something. Not sure how they broke from me picking then up

I finally did it. Today I deleted a “friends” number that never responds or talks to me anymore. This is

today was a great day on my bday.  felt good most of the day – i think i’m finally to

Chapter 42.

I can’t wait to get out of the house and this town for a bit tomorrow. lol. Also gotta get

bored as shit – today and every day lately lolol

I used to love google chrome but it’s starting to suck now. It won’t play embedded music or flash, Guess

i sprained my ankle today. All because I was sitting on the floor and when I stood up to look

I still feel so empty inside.

Married my twin flame Joseph Hall <3 <3 <3 

So I went from having body aches and chills to being hot and having to turn the fan on. I

I am not in a good mood. At all. For various reasons I won’t go into on here. Anyways, gotta

I hate when my phone rings and it’s just a scammer calling or spam. You always think it’s someone calling

i can’t wait to get a new laptop fan. mine is so noisy and annoying. soon. very soon. 🙂 can’t

watching Beavis and Butt-Head with Josephj . We had junk food for dinner lol

so joseph is on his way over to hang out. this will be date 3 i guess lol we just

guess i will just be nervous the rest of the week lol i only got 4 hours of sleep last

2 and a half hour phone call a bit ago. haha. great conversation though. felt good to laugh. i should

fireworks sat. I am going to go see fireworks Saturday night even If I have to go alone. my son

beach I guess my sister is disappointed that I don’t want to go to the beach tomorrow now. Well who

Tired tired of feeling miserable. tried to get some new meds today but read the side effects that said something

Today was grand I got to spend time with my son today. 🙂 picked him up a little after 12:30

ihop going to eat at ihop with the fam in a bit. i just didn’t feel like getting dressed or

finally ate. finally had something to eat. even if it was just potatoes lol. tomorrow is father’s day. i hate

I don’t know what you’re doing God, but I know it’s going to be beautiful. Thank you for giving me

I want to play agar.io on laptop but i can’t. I hate my computer because it won’t let me play

Stupid Hermine Although we are not getting a hurricane, we are still supposed to have bad weather here and I

Need You Now sometime in the past: in reference to the Lady Antebellum song… Her: I need you now Him:

nothing really has changed here. or really gotten any better. if anything it has gotten a little worse. people say

3 weeks ago on a thursday.   that was the last time i saw him.  but we didn’t hang out

been sad again today. i only told one person.

work today. blah.  not feeling it (as usual) i would rather stay home and play on my new laptop i

FYT

i’m nervous about hanging out with him again.

anyone that can bait and trap an animal and take an animal off and just dump it somewhere and then

i miss having someone to talk to about everything and be silly with. i miss being and feeling close to

noises are really bugging me this morning.  stupid neighbors, dog outside,  and noises inside. ugh.  i am already dreading going

well no school for me. too much negative reviews and i don’t need any debt. so i’m stuck ith my

i don’t believe in anyone or anything anymore.  i am disappointed to the max with it all. i don’t really

the more time he spends away the more my feelings are starting to fade. it’s sad but true. maybe it’s

already having a meltdown.  fuck your food since you want to b an ass.  did i mention i hate my

i forgot. it’s n ever okay to express how i feel. my bad.  i really don’t care anymore if the

finally got my paypal to work, so now i can try to sell more stuff on ebay and get my

i might have got 4 hours of sleep if that. woke up feeling weird heart things. thought i was going

i know it’s over for good now. i can feel it.  that he doesn’t care for me that way anymore.

i went to sleep hurting inside & out and woke up the same even s few times during the night.

just had veggie soup and a grilled cheese. and some tea.

you may have given up one me but i’m not going to give up on myself. maybe just maybe i

no one loves me this i know for their actions tell me so to him i know i don’t belong

but yet i’m still going to save all of our messages. just so i can remember that i once thought

drinking a coca-cola. it was my moms but she didn’t want the rest. so figured i would drink it.  looking

the more i find out about people the more i want to be even more alone.  people are never what

been watching awkward and had a 2 hour nap lol. it was so cold today but not too bad inside.

so i was told i hurt them when expressing myself. i did not mean to. i was just expressing my

i dread going to work tomorrow. it is not going ot get out the 30s. but at least i get

wow. just got more hate  mail. nothing new lately. i guess that’s what happens when too many people are in

lol. . fuck you.

I am up and ready for work. had some trouble sleeping.  and i woke up sweating.  i’m not in  a

today is already starting out crappy. one of the shitmobiles won’t crank. so now i get to get taken to

it smell like burnt skin in here.

now y hard drive stopped working. my eternal one that i just got fixed. if it wasn’t for bad luck

seeing happy couples posting pictures and videos online being silly and going places and on dates and such makes me

it’s so hard going to work and doing things when your heart hurts.  i would rather just be alone then

so work wasn’t so bad today. the day kinda went by fast.  ps. sabotage. oh well. . came home and

i cry to much. i’m crying now.

he once asked me what the question was that i said i was glad i didn’t ask a while back..

i go to sleep lonely and sad and wake up lonely and sad. and lets not forget anxious. i’m tired

i really want a samsung galaxy s5 but i will probably end up with s3. lol i had an s2

Your soul’s color is:SilverSilver souls are rare but they’re also a level above everyone else. As a silver soul, you’re

it really sucks when no one understands you.  and they can’t relate or feel or understand how you feel. it’s

i should have said oh yeah? then PROVE IT FOR ONCE!

congrats. you lost me. feeling: heartbroken

feeling hurt feels weird being single again after the last almost 6 months, but it’s better than being lied to.

feeling heartbroken guess this weekend is going to suck now. hard to believe i was looking so forward to it

Today, Cheryl, we believe God wants you to know that … love is the opposite of logic. Logic is argumentative,

i knew good & well if i went to that viewing that i would feel all depressed later. i just

still thinking about my cousin. i can’t believe he died today. RIP Russell Bryant. my birthday twin. he was a

just blocked another person on fb. tired of his shit too. bye mofo.

nothing is workng right. i want to sleep.

i hope i feel better than this tomorrow. today i felt like crap. took an advil but still don’t feel

Go to bed feeling lonely & wake up feeling lonely. God it’s getting old. 

I miss you my son and I love you unconditionally. Nothing or no one could ever change that. Ever. 

i’m down to 168.2  🙂

on season 7 of dexter.  just finished the first one of 7.. it’s getting so good… i still gotta download

been spending the day with my son today <3

another one bites the dust. NEXT!

i cry a lot. and i think about things a lot.  i am now. i need to just try to

new name yeah i am already thinking about changing my tumblr name again. i just need a good one. why

this is the camera i am getting soon. we are trading cams.  http://www.walmart.com/ip/Olympus-14-MP-SZ-12/20549997

bye amino. finally got that stink ass turtle out of my room. put him in the room across the hall.

tonight.going to see chaos play at the shriners tonight. they want me to take pictures for them. said they got

sick. every day  sick!i’m tire of being sick. tired of the headaches. the stomachaches. the anxiety. all of it. had

new laptop  i can’t wait until i get my new macbook. sick of this acer. and sick of windows. he

my thoughts today: you know that spark you feel when you meet someone new that you are interested in and

i have survived and will keep on surviving. thanks for making me a little bit stronger  🙂

when people don’t talk to you for a week then you randomly get a text cause they don’t know how

i wrote you a letter but was too chicken to send it. i’m not 100 percent sure that’s what i

you’re never there when i need you the most.

i want my boo tonight. i guess i will be up late. cause i can’t sleep lately when i’m alone.

health issues causing me anxiety again. don’t know why but when i go to the bathroom i will start feeling

lately i have been working out on the treadmill. since last week. week before that i was just walking down

i might be going golfing saturday. yay! well after i learn and stuff.. i need a new hobby and the

i hate when you abandon me! cause that makes you just like everyone else i’ve known.

and the heat comes on

i don’t know why i got up so early (after 7) and i’m still up. just wasn’t able to go

had a great day with aaron but now his dad is about to pick him up then i’ll be alone

really, you gonna bring aaron sat and take him back sunday. guess i don’t get my week after all :

get it through your head – I DON’T LIKE YOU THAT WAY! but since you can’t it’s goodbye forever! i

i hate pms. right now i just hate everything.l!!l

every time i start cleaning my room, it ends up worse then when i started… fuck

just finished watching the movie “take me home tonight” on netflix. awesome movie. i love 80s themed movies. and the

hakuna matata…

hard to believe there is no one on this stupid planet meant just for me.

not sure if it will ever happen but i hope one day someone in the world will love me. and

we miss and love you teresa. give my dad a hug in heaven for me. will see you all again

waking up lonely sucks. the phone woke me up actually. i was in dreamland. where my dreams are better than

how long must i wait? it feels like that is all i ever do.

my body feels so awful and my head hurts too. i can tell it’s going to rain soon. my legs

It’s okay, I’m used to it.

so life isn’t going so great right now. story of my life though right? i just don’t know what to

Anonymous asked: Did you like high school? no i hated school. middle & high school. although i did pretty well

ice cream for breakfast

i got to hang out with my friend maria yesterday. we went bowling and to mariachis and visit some friends.

so we are leaving at 11:30 pm tonight to go to the bus station in columbia to pick up my

so i am seeing my son aaron saturday. and i’m seeing my girl maria saturday and meeting her adopted mom.

well on a brighter note my friend’s bus gets to sumter at 6:30 saturday morning. i can’t wait to see

wow, way to hurt my feelings.  well if you don’t want to come then don’t. i’m not forcing you. guess

so my friend maria is coming down from missouri to visit me. she is coming on a bus and leaving

so i can’t wait to go to sleep tonight. lol i have been so tired lately. but we are going

so i didn’t get to see aaron today 🙁 guess he didn’t get to come. and i don’t know if

so i can’t call or text anyone cause my cell, clothes, and other items are at a person’s house that

4th of july weekend. my son is going to the mountains saturday so i won’t get to see him until

last night we had steak and salad. it was soo good. oh and we had some bud lights and i

i am proud of my son. he got baptized on father’s day. i was going to go see it but

after all that i have been through in life and all the pain i have endured and even caused and

so today i am looking for old pictures of a friend. he had found out a few months ago that

my phone is annoying. it keeps dialing people by mistake. it’s especially annoying when it does that late at night

i had a great weekend. i didn’t get to see my son this weekend. that sucked 🙁 but as far

i hate the word “swag” and i hate the saying “like a boss” ugh!

i am bored today. but don’t have money to do anything. it sucks. and i’m feeling lonely too.

just came in from walking 2 miles. it was around the yard but still.. just needed to walk. feeling stressed

it’s storming here. it did after 1am also and woke us up. might go see radio cult tonight if it

today is a good day. i think i got the job : ) and my mom is going to get

i tried to call aaron after 5 today. it must have been to early. i was gonna call back later

so after the rapture didn’t happen, i took a two hour nap. lol. guess i was tired!

i got home around midnight. i went to charleston to see my heart (aaron) play baseball and to spend some

i am so sick of fake friends. and just fake people in general. i’m tried. i’m done. so if someone

sorry i haven’t been posting much lately. i have been busy : )  been walking. went to sumter at six

just had me a nice bath. aaron called me earlier. he wanted to tell me that his baseball team won

*sigh* i wanna go to the beach so bad :/

gotta love ‘em… not. a message i got today from some dude i met just one time.. Your a beautiful

tonight i od’d on chocolate and chased it with diet pepsi… fatass… that’s me…lol and that’s just a part of

my son aaron called a few minutes ago. that made my night better. : ) i have another headache though.

got shorts on and finally in my bed. and i finally just had to cry. too much on my mind.

i have a headache and i am ready to go lay in my bed. feeling stressed. i don’t know what

so i am going to eat pizza tonight. so  i didn’t succeed in not eating anymore today. and this my

osama bin laden – DEAD! how does it feel, asshole?

i stayed out way too late last night. i knew i shouldn’t have went out.  lol. feeling it today. i

i  hate when people act like they don’t like you but you don’t know what  you did to them. but

i feel so bad for all the people that died today in those storms and tornadoes. that could have easily

i tried to call aaron to see if the storms were bad there and to make sure he was okay

wow i head there was a tornado near here. hope everyone is okay. all the wind woke me up this

running bath water. gonna take a late night bath…

yesterday i bought some hair nail and skin vitamins. i started talking them today. i hope they make my hair

On this day, God wants you to know … that worshipping God is good for you. In a world where

today i walked a little over an hour.  it was so hot out too. i haven’t walked that much in

i wish i was at the beach somewhere just walking down the beach. i haven’t been since 2009. but i

HAPPY EASTER. the best part of my weekend was having my SON : ) friday night we watched 2 movies.

i love that i can use tumblr on my phone. gives me something to do when i’m bored  or not

i miss my son already. it seems i never have enough time with him.

deleting a lot of people on facebook. found out the hard way you can’t trust many people and who my

my son aaron being sweet <3

I am tired and ready to go home to my bed and crash.

On this day, God wants you to know … that when you are at a loss of what to do,

just hanging here alone at home on the couch in a t-shirt with the laptop. waiting to see if it’s

had a nice weekend. fri night at chuckwagon, sat in charleston and sunday a long motorycle ride to camden and

got a new piercing today…i think it looks uneven though 🙁

spent today alone in bed on the laptop. i miss my boyfriend but i’m not sure if i have a

I found out about everything. He’s such a liar. Then he lied again when I told him I knew. Stupid

Chapter 30

graduated c/o 1996

was a bridesmaid at my sisters wedding.